We have started this day off on the right foot! Vivi is slowly being weined off meds, is peeing it out, and is being "deflated" so she is prepped for her big day tomorrow--getting closed up! She is doing well, such a champ! Our issue has been keeping her asleep. She is keeps beginning to wake up--her little right foot starts a-wigglin' and she has done her body shimmy a few times which jacks up her heart rate that we need to keep down. She is a fighter! I can't help but look over her and tell her many times on a daily basis how much I admire her. She is the STRONGEST person I know....it's amazing the things we are able to learn through our children.
Today is first Friday, Jesus' Sacred Heart is very present. When I saw Vivian's chest this morning, I had an image that was very profound for me. This whole time I have thought that this was a cross that Rod and I were carrying, having a child that has a medical obstacle. When I saw her open chest this morning, I realized it is not us carryin the cross, but her. I believe with every being in my body this child has said "yes" to this before she was born to bring other souls closer to Christ. In that instant, I almost saw myself standing at the foot of the cross with Mary's arms wrapped around me and Jesus cradling her in His arms above us on the cross. My vocation as her mother is to love her, to support her, and to stand beside her ESPECIALLY while she is suffering. Living close to the cross is living close to the virtues which bring us closer to Christ--Faith, Hope, Love. Living close to the cross, although there are the emotion ups and downs, feels like we are living in a bubble of immense grace. God is here--each moment, each hurtle, each victory.